Shuffle

It is nice to have play lists, and know them well
Then every song ends in a no man's land
And the dream for that song fades with the music
The next one is ready and you know it
You know exactly where it is going to take you
Sometimes when you don't like what you have
The anticipation of the next one gives you the hope
To wait for the music to be on your side..

But then when it is all shuffled up
Like a card palace that just came down
Jazz, classical, rock and blues
with no sequence whatsoever,
Thrown at you one after the other.
There is no time to wait and plan a dream
That goes with the next song on the list
The song and the dream begin at once
It is confusing, disorganized and stressful
Although it is still, in all its beauty and honesty
The same melodious music.

Enough time and you learn somehow
To like what you get than try to get what you like
The unexpected blues on a summer morning
Or the silent meditation on a crowded bus
Then the dreams get twinkle toes
And they don't need all the pomp and planning
To start dancing as soon as the music plays..
The whole effort of constructing play lists
Suddenly seems futile!

Dilemma

Everything needs to be ended
Or revived at some point..
And it happens after constant interrogation
Of the need and the arrogance
Within..

I am on my own, I can start over..
Chop off these magnificent wings
And wait until I grow them again..
Who knows, they might turn out
Stronger, softer.. bursting with color

What if they never grow back?
What if they shrivel up and die?
What if this is the only pair I ever get?
No..I think I better stay with what I have..

I am scared to use them, lest I exhaust
My supply of healthy feathers..
But what is it good for if I can't fly?
I wish I could get a ready, unambiguous answer..

Maybe I should just keep flying
With what I have until I fall down
Unconscious, by a wise, peaceful lake..
Whether it is time for death or revival..
Is what the lake decides.